I thought about it all day, the conversation repeating itself in my head over and over. "Why don't you feel confortable to talk about it?" It was only at the end of the day as I went to bed that I remembered why.
Because the weight I feel in my chest after I open up hurts far more then if I just kept it to myself.
"I like to think of it like your holding a balloon. The more you keep things to yourself you fill the balloon with a little bit more of air. What do you think will happen to it after a while?"
Of course I know. It's gonna pop! I'm only gonna have another nervous breakdown like I did ever time I reach my limit. But again, it was only when I thought about that the right answer came to me.
But if I let the air out even if it is a little, what will happen to the balloon then? It will fall on top of me, weighing down the dark beast in my chest.
That's why I don't like to talk to anyone, expecially a shrink. I mean, she picked me apart with such small common words and the dog card (she bought in her pet, not knowing I'm a sucker for dogs -.-' ) that I didn't even think, my mouth sorta moved by itself. Now I feel even worse...
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